Sunday, February 26, 2006

Jordan Knight: I'll Be Loving You (Forever)

I have never been able to explain how particular songs get stuck in my head at various points during the day and have ceased to be alarmed at the zany randomness of this phenomenon. So it was that around 10:15 am this morning I found the New Kids on the Block's "I'll Be Loving You (Forever)" looping incessantly through my mind. I actually haven't listened to this song nearly half as many times as most other women of my generation--not because I was not a consummate "New Kids" fan (had my life gone according to the master plan I devised at age nine, Jordan Knight and I would have now been happily married for approximately eight years, ten if the plan had involved getting married in Tennessee, which it didn't), but because I feared that by listening to my New Kids tapes too often, I might somehow damage them and suffer the horrible fate of never being able to listen to them again.

Despite my cautious listening habits, I did become intensely familiar with the entire New Kids canon. While I would not be likely to defend the artistic merit of many of their songs now that my pre-teen obsession with them is long past, I stand by the quality of Knight's solid interpretation of 1970s soul ballad style. His cover of the Delfonics' "Didn't I (Blow Your Mind This Time)" (a deep cut on the "Step By Step" album) is bang-on as far as vocal stylings go--the only problem is the late 1980s pop slickness of its instrumentals sadly pales in comparison to the rich, melodramatic strings of the original (which I intend to put on my turntable as soon as I complete this blog--damn, that's a good song).

The point is, however, that it is one of the gross injustices of the American music industry that Jordan Knight's singing career had to go down on the same ship as the rest of the members of New Kids on the Block. Thankfully, Donnie Wahlberg's acting career was somewhat salvaged, due to the near-miraculous comeback from early 1990s cheesedom pulled off by his younger brother. It hardly seems fair that a guy who went by "Markie Mark," hung out with the "Funky Bunch," churned out C + C Music Factory rip-offs and got famous on the gimmick of dropping trou with abandon now has an A-list movie career, while the very talented, and much classier, Jordan Knight is stuck playing this evening at the Blue Chip Casino in Michigan City, Indiana.

It seems to me that in certain situations, there should be a statute of limitations on boy band excesses. I would like to cite the Justin Timberlake precedent and argue that Jordan Knight has repaid his debt to popular culture and deserves to be redeemed. The guy can really sing--which is more than can be said for most pop idols, past or present. If you have any doubts, I can lend you my pristine New Kids cassette collection. Then again, I'd rather not. Just take my word for it. Oh yeah--and he's still pretty cute too.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

On a recent trip to Beantown – between losing my Target virginity and pretending to blow up British mercenaries while frolicking on "Old Ironsides" – I made the near-mistake of driving through Dorchester in a brand-new Volvo. A carjacking was (mercifully) avoided. However, I was reminded of the Fab Five who sprang forth from the tough Boston neighbourhood nearly 20 years ago. Jordan was my favourite, too. To me, Joe (or Joey, as he was then known) was too much of a baby for my 10-year-old heart; Donnie was too blond; Jon was too involved with Tiffany; and I'm sure we can all agree that the only thing Danny had going for him were his biceps. But Jordan could sing, he could dance, and he had dimples. If that's not the holy trinity for boy-band success, I don't know what is. And Jordan didn't fare too badly compared to my FIRST childhood crush: Ponch. As in, Erik Estrada. Seeing as the two of them have appeared on The Surreal Life, could my third childhood crush be next? Come on down, Richard Dean Anderson!

Daphne Supergirl said...

Was Jon seriously involved with Tiffany? I had no idea! I need some documentation of this. By the way, Ms. Andrea J., I would be more than happy to host a future guest blog entry on your beloved C.H.I.P.s Big Wheel (TM).

Anonymous said...

And you call yourself a New Kids fan! Like so many Iraqi civilians, I'm shocked and awed that you hadn't heard about these two. The big deal was that they had to keep it all secret, so Jon's female fans wouldn't stop buying t-shirts and posters and lunchboxes, etc. They pretty well confirmed it on the New Kids' "Behind the Music" episode. And really, to paraphrase the New York Times tagline, VH1 does give you all the news that's fit for a scandalous tell-all "documentary" with "expert" commentary from trustworthy sources like comedians, Us Weekly writers and celebrity astrologers.
(And thanks for the offer of hosting a C.H.I.P.'s blog in the near future. I'll get on that.)